Stop Being Negative!

Nobody wants to listen to anyone else crying about how bad their business is, how hard it is to find a job, or comments from those who make neutral statements about how challenging the economy is. WE ALL KNOW THAT! Stopt talking about it.

Stop being a sad sack. Get over yourself and get to work! Work two or three times as hard as you did two years ago, and stop crying about it. If bad things happen, deal with it then! Be prepared for them but, don't invite them into your life or your business by focusing so much on them. The universe sends back what you send into it....many times, in multiples.

Use your resources to generate positive energy. Good things don't just happen. Good things are created! So, wash off the negative vibes and go create a positive future!

Congratulations, President Obama

Dear President Obama:

Congratulations on becoming President of our great nation!

A number of people have told me that I should have voted for you, and that you will bring substantial and lasting change to our country. Please don't make them out to be liars. And, please, PLEASE, prove me wrong!

Congratulations again! Good luck to you and to our country!

No Shoes, No Service

Amazing! So, I walk into the men's shoe department of a nationally-known department store. 6 customers, 1 salesperson. I wait a moment, and the salesperson runs past me and asks how he can help me. I tell him the brand of shoe I want (big wide feet, need a certain type for comfort!), and then tell him I need a plain boring black traditional lace-up business shoe, you know, wing tips, or something really exciting like that. He points me to a suped-up disco looking black shoe. I say "That's nice but, I really need just a plan boring traditional business shoe." I tell him the size I need. "I don't have anything that large" he says. I tell hm the width I need. "We don't carry that width", looking slightly annoyed. "But, let me look."

The salesperson brings out two boxes. One is a suped-up disco looking black shoe...boy, that seems familiar. I look at him and say "Business shoe" and I open the other box, which to my surprise, contains a pair of boring black business shoes....wrong size! I try them on, their too snug, I put them back in the box and say thanks. As I begin to walk away he leads me to another table saying "I have these" as he points to a suped-up disco looking black shoe. I stare at him for a moment, I'm sure my jaw dropped a bit, lean forward and say "biz-ness-shoe!" and thank him for his time.

I drive to another shopping center where a store sells nothing but, the shoes I tried to buy in the dept store. The salesperson smiles, tells me how nicely dressed I am, shows me what's on sale, reminds me that the sale ends in a couple of days, and asks my size. She says, "I think we've got that size and width in a few styles. I know you need a business shoe. Have a seat while I check the store room." She comes out with a box, right shoe, right size. Before I try it on she says "If it's too snug, we can order the right size and deliver it to your home in 3 days....would that be ok?". The shoe angels sang! The shoe fit, so I'm wearing it.

The salesperson handed me her card, packed my old shoes away, offered to assist me in any way she could, smiled a few more times, asked me to come again, and said " If we don't meet again, may you have a wonderful life." Not a merely good night...a wonderful life!!! And, she was serious!

The department store had no shoes and offered no service.

The specialty store had some shoes and provided service. And, I probably paid a bit more. In an economy that sucks, retailers need all the sales they can get. The formula isn't that complicated.

Amazing!

Mistakes Aren't Important. What You Do Afterward is What Really Counts!

Do you really think the people in your life, whether in business or your personal life, expect you to be perfect....always? You do? If they've told you that, then maybe you should get some new people in your life. Or, maybe you need to gain a more realistic understanding of what's expected of you.

"No one's perfect!". Boy, is that ever true. So, is your ego so big that you actually believe you can or should be......perfect? Or, do you simply believe so strongly that you should be perfect for those who rely on you that anything less would be an injustice to them?! Either way, that's a pretty big load to carry. And, carrying that weight tends to create difficulties in accepting when a mistake has really been made. I mean, if a person is so hell bent on not making mistakes, not doing what they are built to do, which is sometimes to be imperfect, then their ability to accept an error would likely be distorted, as well. And, that inability often leads to a further challenge or lack of interest in identifing or recognizing simple errors.

Mistakes aren't really important. What's matters most is the steps you take, or don't take, after you realize you made an error. Now, I'm not talking about mamouth errors, where lives could be at stake or where the world might fall off its axis. In those cases, different rules apply. I'm talking about the everyday minor toe-stepping type of seemingly little errors that happen all day long....the ones where a simple acknowledgement and apology suffice to resolve the issue for all eternity.

And, that's usually all it takes.....a simple acknowledgement, an apology that's equal in size and importance to the offense (short and simple when you step on someone's toe; lengthy, sincere, and accompanied by lots of flowers when you forget your wife's birthday or tape over your wedding video!).

Remember that relationships are like that old dentist commercial "Ignore your teeth and they'll go away!" Well, the same is true of relationships. Ignore other people's feelings and your relationships will go away. The same is not true with errors. By ignoring the mistakes you make, they won't go away but, your relationships might! That kind of stuff hangs around for a long time. People have long memories, especially when they feel that someone has negatively affected them or been insensitive. What...just because no one is talking about it, you think you're safe and that you got away with not having to acknowledge your mistake or apologize for it? Guess again, genius!

What's the big deal? I mean, why do so many people have such an incredibly hard time admitting an error and expressing an apology? Admitting an error is not a negative commentary on you as a person? It doesn't suggest that you're weak or inept. It only means that you're human and normal. In fact, offering an apology is a positive statement on you as a person. It says that you are self aware, aware of others, truly concerned about how you might affect others, and that their feelings are important to you. So, the mistake doesn't define you. What you do AFTER the mistake does define you!

"But, what if your action wasn't a mistake? What if, even after the occurrence, you believed that your action was 100% correct, and that given the same circumstance you'd perform in precisely the same manner again? And, what if, given those assumptions, someone in your universe, whether business or in your personal life, felt wronged? Should you lie for the sake of the relationship and apologize, when you feel like you did the right thing? Wouldn't that be worse? Two wrongs don't make a right? Hell no! Here's where we go to a higher standard.

If you take action that is the right one, and someone else gets hurt in the process, why can't you feel solid in the action you took, commit yourself to do it again if necessary because it was truly the right thing to do, and still be considerate of the person who was negatively impacted? In a personal situation, a simple expression of concern for that person's feelings will often go a long way? In a business setting, an admission of the error and an apology for how your action impacted others carries a lot of weight.

Here's an equally large problem. Many people don't apologize, they just explain. "I know that you feel bad BUT, here's why I did it. And, now that you understand (intellectually) why I did it, you shouldn't feel bad (emotionally) anymore. So, everything's fixed now, right? ". WRONG! Or, they blame others for their mistake. Yuck! With either of the above, your situation could quickly go from bad to either "I want a divorce!" or "We're firing your firm and hiring one that cares more about us than themselves!"

Let's face it, whatever the reason, when someone is negatively impacted by our actions (don't forget that people work at companies, and our actions affect them, their careers, and others), do they really care FIRST about why we screwed up? Or, is it something else? Of course it is! People want to be understood, heard, and valued, whether in a personal or business setting. If you're not important enough for me to take into account how my actions impact you, then perhaps we don't fit well together.

So, what's the solution? ACKNOWLEDGE AND APOLOGIZE! If not for your actions, then separate your actions from how they impacted others, and apologize to those people for how they were effected. Acknowledge that they were negatively affected, that you recognize that fact, that how they feel is important to you, that you don't want them to feel that way now or ever again, and that you want to find a solution that makes them feel better. If, your actions were warranted and might have to be repeated again, don't explain first. Resolve that persons emotional response to your actions first. Once that person sees that you really care, only then can you begin to address the foundational issue of the action itself, your reasons behind it, and devise a solution for the future. Perhaps more frequent communications, advanced notice, or an entirely new approach would avoid future misunderstandings.

People aren't perfect...they're human, and humans make mistakes. So, join the human race already! Accept responsibility for your errors, acknowledge them, apologize, devise a solution, and move on. And, be happy!

Mistakes aren't important. What you do afterward really counts!

The Cone of Silence, Chaos (KAOS), and the Smartest Person in the Room - Part Two

So, have you thought about my question? Do you still consider yourself to be the smartest person in the room?

NEWS FLASH! You actually may not be the smartest person in the room, and I’m pretty darned sure that, I'm not, either. Now we’re talking! In the realization that you are not the smartest person in the room lays opportunity! In most cases, the people who are smarter than you have something you don't....and, the good ones are likely willing to share their ideas and thoughts with you. After all, why have all those smarts if not to demonstrate that they exist, right?!

The lady standing next to you in the room probably knows something you don’t. The guy across the table knows something you haven’t considered. The woman sitting next to him knows something he hasn’t heard before. They may not all be university graduates or senior executives but, they all know something. And, that something may be just what you need, an idea; a bit of historical data; a theory; a new approach; a twist on an old concept; a seemingly crazy, far-out, or wild-assed idea….something that you haven’t yet considered or maybe, what you’ve already forgotten.

But, it’s there for you to tap into. That knowledge, that wisdom, those smarts, that are better, deeper, or broader than those you already possess are within your reach and available to excell you further than you could go without them. You see, when a person believes that they are the smartest person in the room, that belief, that one seemingly minor error, in and of itself, suggests that that person isn’t…..the smartest person in the room. What’s more, such a mistake can cause you to miss a very important opportunity…your chance to acquire knowledge from others, to capitalize on what they know, to build on their experiences, to learn more, to become better at whatever you do….to better serve others and to become an even greater success!

Ask yourself: "Do I know EVERYTHING?" That’s an easy one. Then, as you begin to feel a bit humbled, ask yourself "Do I know everything I need to know to accomplish my objective?" If you answer "Yes", try again, and remind yourself that someone somewhere knows something you don’t. And THAT something could be the key ingredient in accomplishing your mission, for yourself and for others.

The most successful leaders I’ve met have been some incredibly quick-minded and intelligent people. Others have been some pretty regular folks. Among the most common traits threse truly smart people possess is the humility and the realization that their knowledge and experience created greater results when augmented by what other smarter people knew. Eachone knew that if they actually were the smartest person in the room, their accomplishments and their ultimate success would be limited by what they did not know.

So, during the course of their careers and their lives, they decided to Get Smart, by sharing their knowledge with, and learning from, others. In order to achieve more, those smart people typically sought out others with more experience, more knowledge, more expertise….more smarts. The interesting point here is that those from whom they learned were not necessarily the most educated or those who were perceived as being the most accomplished. Sometimes, they were just regular people who possessed specific intellectual capital.

So, what’s your best move? Accept that, while you may be pretty intelligent, you are not likely the smartest person in the room, or at least you shouldn’t be. If you really are the smartest one there, then go to another room, or find people who truly are smarter than you and who can help you accomplish more with what they know. If that means you must find your own Agent 99 then, go get her!

Your best bet will be to ditch the Cone of Silence, get dumb, then Get Smart, and excel further than your own smarts alone can take you!

Let me know how you do.

ADVANCING YOUR CAREER CAN BE AS EASY AS TELLING A JOKE....IN REVERSE!

If financial executives were salespeople, the business world would be a very messed-up place! However, since the careers of financial executives are almost always in transition, it is imperative that they not become salespeople but, instead acquire some of the knowledge and most useful skills of salespeople, so as to better promote themselves and maintain control over their career paths.

Here's a thought for your future success at self-promotion. Remove the emotional concerns that you may have about having to become a salesperson, about possibly coming off as a used car salesman, being too pushy, or overdoing it. You're none of the above, and neither will you magically morph into a plaid jacket wearing snake-oil salesman!

Instead, focus only on the facts. Not the facts of what you have done, where you've worked, the titles you've held, or what you would like to do. Frankly, no one cares about your past. The person who may hire you for your next exciting position cares only about what you will do for her company or for her. The facts on which you should focus most of your efforts and communications are the value you can create for an organization and the results they can expect to derive. Those facts will be interesting to whomever you speak.

Think about presenting yourself by using the structure of a joke. Let's be clear here. Your career is not a joke. I'm talking about using the structure of a joke to understand how to succeed at achieving your goals. Instead of starting the story of your career objectives in the traditional manner of laying a foundation and building to the end, this time tell it in reverse. That's right, during every career opportunity meeting you must present yourself as if you were telling a joke in reverse...punchline first!

The normal approach to talking about one's career is similar to how we tell jokes. You set up the foundation of the story (Two sailors walk into a bar....), then you provide details and justification by providing evidence of your career history, what you did, how you did it, and so on. Then, 10, 20, 45 minutes later, long after the listener may have glazed over waiting for you to tie things together and incorrectly attempted to foresee where you were heading, if the listener was interested in the first place and if they're still listening, you hit them with the punchline. Them the listener is foced to think back to what you said twenty minutes ago to tie it to your punchline. What a perfect way to ruin a great career opportunity!

In sales, it's common knowledge that a salesperson has anywhere from 10 to 45 seconds to gain a customer's interest, and perhaps, the beginning of his confidence. So, why would you waste those precious moments talking about stuff that the listener may not care about? Why would you spend any time talking about anything other than what will excite the listener and drive him to want to know more about you and, ultimately, to hire you?

The single and most important statement you can make is how you will create value for the person across from whom you are sitting and for the company he or she represents. That's the punchline! And, frankly, its all they really care about, and all they should care about! Then, tell the rest of the story by supporting it with how you accomplished and why you're qualified.

Consider using a 5 step process like this:

1. Punchline: "After researching your company and gaining an understanding of its objectives, I believe that I may be able to reduce your operating costs by 33%, reduce time to communicate with the Board and shareholders by 20%, reduce risk by 25%, and double profitability in 6 months. (Or, whatever achievements you expect)"

2. How: "I'll employ.................to achieve the above objectives"

3. Why: "My qualifications, background, and experience include...."

4. Creative Case Study: "In my last role as CFO at XYZ Company, I took them public and was able to...."

5. Closing: How would your company benefit by what I am confident I can achieve for it? How can we further this discussion? If not, do you know of another company or two that might benefit from my expertise, experience, and business style?

The above works best when you know what the company with whom you're speaking needs to achieve. So, advanced research is an excellent way to understand how best to approach them. If that information is not available, then the above approach is still a more laser-like communication tool than the more common one, perhaps using different content.

Good luck! Please contact me to let me know about your success in using this approach.